caveat: i don't actually care too much about it, since i won't be able to make it myself,* and i should emphasize that i plan to stick around for about fifty more years, but here are my current thoughts on the matter:
+for my gravestone, if i have one, which i probably won't, but if: "exit, pursued by a bear." with an engraved bear, perhaps, like this one.
+play these songs at the service or whatever: heaven, by talking heads, "this must be the place," by talking heads, naked as we came, by iron and wine, maybe "the age of adz" by sufjan stevens, and "my life," by iris dement.
+here's where i start to get bored and think, "oh do whatever you want! cry a lot and have fun too!" but i don't have a special church-type place, and funeral homes are pretty grim. could you do it outside, like a picnic or something?
*i will be indisposed.